Rest In Peace Girl

I've never felt so complete... Conor, I love you.

So I'm officially giving up. If anyone wants anything to do with me, they're going to have to come to me. I'm tired of extending myself out to people and giving so much but not getting anything back from it. I'm tired of one-sided relationships. If you won't love me, don't fucking bother me. I don't mean to sound like a bitch by this, but honestly... I don't know how much more I can put myself through. I went back to Jersey last weekend to visit my family and while I was there, I saw Steve... my ex-boyfriend. God, it hurts just to think about him... I mean it hasn't been that bad because I could alwayignore the whole situation, but seeing him standing in front of me, smiling at me like he never lied and said he loved me... it killed me. I loved him so much... well, I thought I loved him. I guess I didn't, because love isn't one-sided. Anyways, he has a new boyfriend now... his name is Kyle. They're happy, which I should be happy about, but it fucking kills me. That's what love does. It kills you. And I want no part of it.

So I've decided that there's really nothing left for me. There is no one, I have nothing. This is all worthless. I want to let go. I want to be free. I don't think waiting for someone to save me and pull me out of this hole is worth the wait. Someone help me. Please.